Best gay BDSM dating sites
Gay men have interests in BDSM, from leather and whips to domination, submission, and other quirky kinks. But sometimes, it can be difficult to find someone interested in the same fantasies that you are. While many gay dating sites and apps cater to these interests, there are specific sites that you should use to find men with similar tastes easier and quicker. We’ve tried the 5 best gay BDSM dating sites online to help you make the best decision. Each one has free membership options so that you can trial the service at no cost!
Buddygays.com
While there is no BDSM filter on Buddygays, it has a growing gay membership specializing in finding single gay men in your area. Many of its members show their interest in BDSM through their usernames, profile pictures, and profile information. There is a status update feature where you can write preferences to people who view your profile. With a free account, you can send up to 5 daily messages, use the local search features, and see who has viewed your profile too. There are 4 price plans:
- 1 day – £0.99
- 1 week – £1.49 per day
- 1 month – £1.07 per day
- 3 months – £0.78 per day
Rating: 2 Stars – An active gay dating site but has no specific BDSM features.
Gaystryst.com
Gaystryst.com is another great all-purpose dating website for gay men. Signup is incredibly easy with just an email address required. A free account allows you to send 5 daily messages, view profiles, and search locally. While there is no specific search facility or categories for interests, many members have BDSM-centric profiles with their preferences, interests, and more in their dating profiles. Upgrading allows you to send unlimited chats, view pictures in galleries, and use long-distance searches. There are 4 price plans:
- 1 day – £0.99
- 1 week – £1.49 per day
- 1 month – £1.07 per day
- 3 months – £.078 per day
Rating: 2 Stars – An active gay dating site but has no specific BDSM features.
Gaysgodating.com
Gaysgodating.com is a gay dating site that has a huge variety of men. Whilst there are no specific search features for different fantasies, many users have this information easily located within their profile. Free features are unlocked once you verify your email. These searching and viewing nearby profiles and sending 5 daily messages. Upgrading allows you to send unlimited chats, look at full pictures in galleries, use extended search, and share photos/videos in chat. There are 3 price plans you can choose from, including:
- 1 day – £0.99
- 1 week – £1.49 per day
- 1 month – £1.07 per day
- 3 months – £.078 per day
Rating: 2 Stars – General gay dating site with no dedicated BDSM features.
Recon.com
Recon.com specializes in BDSM gay dating and comes with a mobile app for iOs and Android. Recon has a huge number of members worldwide, all easily searchable in the main site’s database. You can search through several specific BDSM subcategories, which is a great way of finding that perfect match. Free features are unlocked once you verify your email and include setting up a profile, searching local and international profiles, viewing main profile pictures, and sending messages. An upgraded membership includes viewing unlimited member profiles, viewing private galleries, premium search, ad-free mobile app use, and more. There are different price plans to suit a variety of needs, including auto-renewal and fixed-term:
- 30 days – £9 (Auto-renewal)
Fixed-term plans:
- 30 days – £9
- 90 days – £20
- 180 days – £34
- 365 days – £56
Rating: 5 stars – An active, popular dating site with search options and a mobile app.
xtremboy.com
Xtremboy.com has over 60,000 members and is a discreet BDSM dating website with a mobile app. All users must upload a profile picture upon registration, which may include erotic content. Free features of xtremboy.com include viewing profiles around you and search specific categories, including dominant, submissive, S&M, and much more. You can also like member profiles and send and receive messages. An upgraded membership includes searching through special search categories, including Most Viewed profiles and users who’ve visited/liked your profile. There are 3 price plans which can be paid in euro or dollars. Prices include:
- 1 month for €12 (€12 per month)
- 6 months for €55 (€9.17 per month)
- 12 months for €75 (€6.25 per month)
Rating: 5 stars – An active, popular dating site with search options and a mobile app.
Challenges of Gay BDSM dating
There are several challenges for gay men looking to try BDSM dating.
Privacy
Some gay men may be embarrassed about their kinks or fetish interests online and may not be comfortable sharing their profile pictures on these sites. It’s a good idea to use a site or app which uses specific categories, so you can find a match who has similar, niche interests.
Visibility
Many gay dating sites and apps are not specific to BDSM dating. And although you can set up a profile listing your interests, it may be hard to find matches. Choosing a site that specializes in your kinks will help you find dates quicker.
Safety
Everyone has different sexual preferences. And one of the main priorities you must have with BDSM dating is establishing clear guidelines and boundaries for one another. Always remember to protect yourself at all times.
Who uses Gay BDSM dating sites?
Many gay, bisexual, and straight (but curious) men use BDSM gay dating sites. There are lots of subcategories that interest a wide variety of men, including but not limited to domination, submissive, leather, and more. Some fantasies may not even have search functions on websites!
FAQ
What is BDSM? And is it for me?
BDSM is a term that stands for erotic roleplaying, including bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, and masochism. Whilst everyone has their preferences and ‘kinks,’ BDSM is a popular term because it includes an open-mindedness to fetish and kinks of all kinds. There are many subcategories of BDSM, some or all of which may interest you.
Is it safe?
Like all sexual practices, it’s important to recognize how to protect yourself, especially if you are new to BDSM, and seeing if you enjoy the practice. When meeting with someone for the first time, establish with your partner what the ground rules are, what you are comfortable with, and what you are interested in trying out.
How does a Gay BDSM dating site work?
Many gay men use dating sites looking for BDSM matches. Many BDSM-specific dating sites are solely aimed at those looking for men interested in their kinks. The sites we have recommended and reviewed all have free membership options – our advice is to try them and see which ones cater to your interests. Now it’s time to log on and fulfill your fantasies. As always, be safe and have fun.